Stick to writing about subjects you know something about – or at the very least, properly research your topics. You have made a very vulnerable subset of single mothers feel even worse. After all, I don’t have a special needs child, and my knowledge of the subject is from the periphery. I say the following with zero shaming, but simply sharing what I wonder: Objectively, we put a man on the moon. Could one of those dates lead to love, companionship, a lover with a man whose life fits yours in a way that satisfies you both? No one in my life has ever loved or respected me the way he does.
You should remove this horribly inaccurate and insensitive post. This post may reflect possibilities for the less severe special needs situations, but it’s actually offensive to minimize the situations you clearly know nothing about. I asked this poster for more information about her situation, and why romance, sex and love is out of the question. Does romance have to mean full-time, traditional marriage- or something that works for both parties? I didn’t know who I really was until he was in my life. I am truly lucky and privileged to have him as my son.
For a certain subset of us, our kids are so severe, there is no sitter available. Here is a summary of our exchange: Me: Can you elaborate in a way that would want me to engage? Mom: I have a 15 year old son, who is severely disabled. That being said, because of his disabilities, my life is unique. In order to do so I will need to share some graphic details. My son has severe, nonverbal autism, debilitating obsessive compulsive disorder, bipolar mania, two inoperable brain tumors, severe epilepsy and possibly schizophrenia.
I made a commitment to him years ago that I would ALWAYS insist he is treated with dignity. He will never be able to speak, but he understands everything that is said. When regulated, he can communicate with an i Pad, yet he always makes his wants known, even without the i Pad.
When I divorced many years ago, I was fine with the idea of being alone with my kids for the rest of my life.
You need to take care of yourself and have some fun to be happy!
One good friend whom I trust implicitly (and someone who has a disabled child of her own) suggests I not tell a future dating partner at all.
"Just let him meet David, then explain that he's a child with autism.
He's a fact of life and a part of my life and I wouldn't trade him, or his sister for the world. But I'm going to be dating a lot more soon (well, hopefully I am...) and I don't really know whether I should talk about my disabled kid or just talk about my kid and mention his disability at a later time.
Oh, please, don't for one minute think he's my dilemma, because he's not.
As a single parent, dating may not always be at the forefront of your thoughts.