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They call her, only to find her cell phone abandoned outside the chemistry laboratory.They enter the lab to find it upturned, with broken beakers and blood on the floor.When his father dies, Jeffrey (Ryan Reynolds) is sent to live with his aunt Charlotte (Glenne Headly) in Canada.

(I won’t even mention Race to Witch Mountain.) “I’m following in some amazing footsteps,” Gugino told me. “These roles are very sexual,” she went on about the O’Neill romp. It’s not something I shy away from.” Nor does the play, which, she said, “explores all of these primal notions. (Doing this play instead of transferring to Broadway in his reasons to be pretty role, he told me, was “a no-brainer.”) Taller than a Sitka spruce, Schreiber is an intensely earnest type who confirmed my suspicion that this is a torrid trolley ride through lust and greed. The show manages to turn ’80s hard rock into what’s basically an extended Happy Days episode on wine coolers and hair products.

‘A work of monumental passion and epic sensuality,” trumpets the press release for the Broadway revival of Eugene O’Neill’s Desire Under the Elms. To me, this is the sexy show of the season.” But there are some limits, of course.

They had me at “A.” And if you’ve seen the steamy commercial for the show, you know that if the Iceman got a front row seat, he’d probably cometh. “I tried to get Brian Dennehy to show his ass,” said Falls, impishly, “but he declined.” Now that would be a behemoth of a show.

After all, ‘Desire’ is in the title.” “So is ‘Under,’ ” I whinnied, annoyingly. “It’s written at a scale that some have termed operatic,” he asserted. But its dopey winkiness is so relentless that by the end of it, while my mind had surely rotted, I was half-smiling and had almost forgotten Jersey Boys‘ “Sherry” in favor of this show’s “Oh, Sherry.” (Yes, a character is named Sherry, just so they can sing that famous song.

“It’s massive—a behemoth of a play.” And the audience is strapped in for 100 intermissionless minutes without a condom. If it was a country jukebox show, she’d surely be named Jolene!

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Emily does not quite believe that Toby killed Alison and had intended to kill her as well. Meanwhile, Officer Barry comes to the house to let Mrs.

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